Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
