she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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