are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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