Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
