And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
