And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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