sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
