I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
