i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
