never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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