bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize