i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Floor bacon is actually really good
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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