i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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