Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
