Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
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