My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize