just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
