i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
