I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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