hotel room ftw
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
