Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
