The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude