i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Randomize