You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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