Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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