Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize