Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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