Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
