Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
