Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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