I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
