That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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