shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
