his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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