You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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