Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
