is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Do vagina's smell?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
If I die, sorry about rent.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
