I don't usually arrange sex via text message
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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