I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize