Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
