dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
