you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
