when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
