this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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