i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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