all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
