he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
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