with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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