you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
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FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
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And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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