just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
