Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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